There is pain in my heart after hearing that Mother Teresa suffered a great many years of terrible doubting of God and her faith. The fact that she continued to devote her life to a difficult call given to her by this God makes me think more than ever that she was a saint in all senses of the word. The letters give a whole new perspective—a whole new complexity—to a woman who we thought had a simple faith. I am so glad the Catholic Church was not afraid to publish the letters, not afraid to let the world know that even the faithful can have doubts and even the faithful may not feel God’s presence in their lives, and yet they can still follow the path of God. An agnostic in my family once said to me, “I envy you your simple faith.” I was floored. My faith is anything but simple! I had to be completely broken before I could believe in God. I had many, many questions for many, many years. Mother Teresa has shown me that even the best of us struggle with God. The questioning of a saint does not mean that God does not exist. Being able to actually feel the presence of God or hear the voice of God is not a requirement for believers, but for unbelievers.
Mother Teresa gave this world a great gift in her letters. Writing out of the dark depths of her soul, she showed us that man’s imperfections can be overcome by faith, yes, even blind faith. I pray that Mother Teresa is at peace in the arms of Jesus. Although she doubted her belief in Jesus, on earth her tortured faith undoubtedly brought the only Jesus that many people might ever see.
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