A memoir of overcoming: Gwen Plano and Letting Go into Perfect Love

Posted on June 29, 2014 by moonbridgebooks

Letting Go Into Perfect LoveToday I am pleased to feature Gwendolyn Plano, author of the memoir Letting Go into Perfect Love:  Discovering the Extraordinary After Abuse. Plenty of people have written memoirs about surviving and overcoming abuse of different types, and these are valuable not only as inspiration for others trying to escape from similar situations, but as learning experiences for those who know nothing about these situations. How can a successful career woman come home and live and mother her children in a hostile environment? Who knows what kind of secret lives hide behind a bright exterior? Gwen, too, shows us that behind someone we might see every day, there are hidden demons at work.

I am impressed that Gwen goes beyond the recognition, struggle, and escape to finding personal and spiritual enlightenment. She seems not just a healed woman, but one who is now flying high embracing life and the goodness of God. Read on to see how writing her story helped her and how her story might help all of us. Thank you, Gwen, for being my guest and telling us about your journey.

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When I began writing my book, I expected to simply tell my story: a farm girl goes to the big city, falls in love, marries, experiences tragedy, falls in love again, marries but then knows abuse, and along the way has four beautiful children.  As the pages unfolded though, I realized that my story was everyone’s story. The details of my journey are unique to me of course, but the emotions accompanying those details are universal. We all know sorrow, fear, or regret, and we all travel through life trying to make sense of it all. Maya Angelou wrote, “There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.” I now understand the agony of which she speaks, for the story ultimately is not mine—it belongs to all of us. I simply held a version of it temporarily.

Writing Letting Go into Perfect Love was an integrative process for me. At times it tore open my heart, such that I could barely breathe. However, my tears and gasps came and went because they could. As I accepted and honored these emotions, compassion emerged; and, it was this development that redirected my writing, and quite frankly, my life.

Why did I write this book? I really did not have a choice. It demanded to be told, awakening me in the early morning and drawing me to my desk. That said, midway through my book, I explain a specific and heartfelt reason that many readers might miss.  The paragraph reads:

For more than two decades I had tried to shield my children from the sorrows in our home, but I now realize that my secret separated me from them. My closeted life held my heart, with its forgotten dreams and innocent longings—a heart that the healers had described as “shattered in little pieces” and “held together with tape and string.” Though I did not know how to bridge the years of hiding, I knew I needed to bring levity into our home and healing into our lives.

When we are not free to be ourselves, a vital part of us disappears under layers of numbness. It is this shell of a person that others see—not who we ultimately are.  As I disentangled myself from an abusive marriage, I re-discovered who I am—and why I had hidden for so many years. I also realized that I needed to bridge the chasm separating past and present—for me and for others.

When any of us come out of the proverbial closet, the fear of disclosure can be overwhelming, but the alternative is a lost life. I wrote Letting Go into Perfect Love to help others realize that they can open the door behind which they hide, and when they take this action, an amazing life awaits them.

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In writing about her own lessons, in learning the redemptive power of love through suffering, spiritual practice, and grace, Gwen Plano allows her readers to reconnect with the painful moments in their own lives and to use those moments to walk a path toward healing and life fulfillment. – from reviewer Bonnie Boron

Gwen Plano is quite an accomplished woman with four university degrees in different Gwen Planofields of study. She has worked mostly as an administrator at various colleges – including one in Japan! She is also a Reiki Master and certified Lifeline Practitioner. Letting Go into Perfect Love is her first book, but when you see her writing style you will think she’ll surely write more. Learn more about Gwen at her website and blog, From Sorrow to Joy, where you will also find she has a Goodreads giveaway that will run from July 1-8.

Posted in book talk, inspiration, overcoming, Spiritual | Tagged | 3 Comments

Becky Povich – Reminiscing smaller life stories into one big story

Posted on June 22, 2014 by moonbridgebooks

Pigtails to Chin HairsI met Becky Lewellen Povich through the St. Louis Writers Guild and found her book, From Pigtails to Chin Hairs: A Memoir and More, to be exactly what I like to encourage in lifewriting. Many people, if not most, do not have a journey of overcoming this or that or of going on a big adventure of personal discovery, but their stories are interesting and worth writing about. My own mother thought her stories of life around WWII in Japan were boring and everyday. “Who cares about that?” she’d tell me when annoyed by my persistent questions.

Our everyday stories usually involve history and culture and the social mores of the time. Those with similar stories bond through common memories. Younger people learn about the “old days.” We might learn about totally different cultures or perspectives. What bonds all of us together in stories are universal experiences and emotions. Becky is my guest today and discusses the writing of her book.

Becky, please tell us why you wrote your memoir, From Pigtails to Chin Hairs: A Memoir & More.

Although I’d never written anything other than personal letters, business correspondence, office newsletters, and the perpetual Christmas letter, I felt compelled in 2001to begin writing my memoir. Every time I actually say or write those words, I think How crazy was that!? But for some reason, I believed I had the talent to do it.

There were two main occurrences in 2001 that prompted me to write: the near death of my estranged father, and reading Haven Kimmel’s memoir, A Girl Named Zippy: Growing Up Small in Mooreland, Indiana. As I read Ms. Kimmel’s book, I kept thinking if I were to write my memoir, it would be similar to hers; short snippets of everyday life, some that were poignant, sad, funny, hilarious, insightful. In addition to writing it for myself and my family, I firmly believed a great deal of readers would love it and it could possibly make a difference in their lives. And since I didn’t concentrate on just my young, growing up years in the 1950s and 60s, thus the subtitle: A Memoir & More, I also had faith that it would appeal to women of all ages.

What made you decide to self-publish?

I didn’t make that decision until I’d written my way along a very lengthy path, which basically took 12 years from my very first thoughts, to being near completion of my memoir. After things didn’t work out with a small press that had previously been interested in publishing it, I looked into other areas, which included the possibility of a New York agent looking at it. But, my ultimate decision was to go with Createspace for several reasons. The main one was I was nearing the age of 60 and didn’t want to “waste” any time hoping the agent might look at my manuscript, might accept it, and try to sell it. If I was in my 20s or 30s, I might have gone that route. But, then again, maybe not. I was very particular about the title and cover of my memoir, the fonts used, the black and white photos I wanted included, etc. Yes, I wanted to be in complete control of my baby!

Did writing your memoir prompt you to view yourself and your life in ways other than you originally assumed?

Very much so! It didn’t happen right away, though. It took a lot of writing about the sadder times for me to begin looking at things differently. And although there were things I wished I could’ve changed about my life, I also realized that I wouldn’t be who I am today, if any of those events hadn’t happened. I’m very happy with who I am, and where I am, at this stage of my journey in life.

Can you tell us a little bit about your writing process?

Well, I really don’t have one! I’m definitely not a disciplined writer. I’m a “write when I’m in the mood” kind. (Hmm, could be one reason why my memoir took me 12 years to write!) I like to attribute it to the fact that I never had an education in writing. I didn’t attend college, or any writing classes, so therefore I don’t have the proper mindset. (I really am kidding; not about the 12 years, but about my excuses!)

I’m in the beginning stages of writing the sequel to Pigtails, and I know this book will definitely not take years to complete. I learned so much writing my first book and I am a bit more conscientious these days. My goal for the sequel’s publication is 2015. I think I’d better get busy!

– Becky Lewellen Povich is a writer, humorist, and “bliss follower” who started writing later in life. She is published in Chicken Soup for the Soul and other anthologies and periodicals. Find out more about Becky at her website or blog.

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Becky’s stories are warm-hearted personal interest stories of growing up in the Midwest during the 1950s-1960s, dealing with her parents’ divorce at a time when divorce was unusual, coming of age and getting married, and continuing the dramas and peculiarities and amusing moments we all have in our own ways. Smiles, laughter, pain, sadness, we can all relate to those emotions.  I like her comment about how she “realized that I wouldn’t be who I am today if any of those events hadn’t happened.” Sometimes you can learn a lot about life and about yourself by writing down your “everyday” stories, and others may learn a thing or two, too.

In case you think you have an everyday and boring life not worth writing about:

How to Write About Your Boring Life

 

Posted in book talk, capturing memories, lifewriting | Tagged , | 9 Comments

A family’s stories turn into a novel of love and Vietnam War perspectives

Posted on June 15, 2014 by moonbridgebooks

“A mesmerizing debut novel, Once Upon a Mulberry Field tells a heartrending tale of American and South Vietnamese love at a time when both countries were torn apart by war.” I recently discovered C.L. Hoang online in a Facebook group and ordered his new book. Hoang was born in South Vietnam and lived there with his family during the Vietnam War. He came to the US in the 1970s because of the war, and became an engineer, and now an author. In an interview with him posted on MilitaryPress.com, he says:

I started the book as a nostalgia project for my father so that we could capture memories of our family’s earlier life in Saigon, Vietnam, during the war. As I researched that time period to ensure accuracy, I discovered another perspective of the war—as experienced by American service people who fought over there and by their families in the States. I ended up merging these two contrasting points of view, in hopes of providing a more complete picture of that turbulent chapter in the history of both countries. But rather than being a “war book,” Once Upon a Mulberry Field is first and foremost a love story—an ode to the old and the new homelands, and a celebration of the human spirit and the redemptive power of love.

Who can resist a book like that? Not me. I have written before about turning memoir into fiction in order to tell a bigger story. Sometimes the constraints of sticking to a true life story hobble an important message or a bigger picture the author wants to get across. I like how Mr. Hoang wanted to put forth different perspectives of a highly controversial war. For those who don’t know or remember, Vietnam vets were subject to ugly name-calling or worse when they returned home, thanks to discovery of atrocities committed—a complex subject. And who has read personal stories—or any stories—from the Vietnamese side? Read the rest of the interview with C.L. Hoang here in the March 10, 2014, Military Press article: Once Upon a Mulberry Field. Read about the poetic meaning of the book’s title in Huang’s blog post “Mulberry Fields and the Blue Sea.”

I asked C.L. Hoang to tell me a little more about the writing of his book.

“Unfortunately my dad passed away before the book was finished. It was dedicated to him and my mom, who had died before him. My book was to bear witness to their generation who had known war all their lives, from the fight for independence from the French to the struggle against communism. But the book also pays homage to American veterans who served in Vietnam and came home to a hostile political atmosphere.”

Find C.L. Huong and his blog at mulberryfieldsforever.com.

Once Upon a Mulberry Field

Posted in book talk, heritage, history, honoring veterans, multicultural, war stories | Tagged , , | 2 Comments