Loss of a loved one, finding poetry in caregiving

It is over. It is ironic that I wrote about my recent first experience with Dia de los Muertos (Day of the Dead) for my last blog post. I love the meaning behind this Mexican holiday of honoring those who have passed before us and of the power to remain alive through memories. Since then, my mother passed away, her spirit carried perhaps on the wings of a butterfly.Poems That Come to Mind

Also ironic is that only a day before my mother first felt ill and everything snowballed, a poetry book I’ve been working on went live online at Amazon. Poems That Come to Mind is a short book of mostly Japanese style haiku and tanka that tell about the experience of caring for someone with dementia. I was able to celebrate the publication momentarily, happy I’d gotten it out during the month of my mother’s birthday since it is in honor of her. My mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s a few years after I published her memoir, Cherry Blossoms in Twilight.

Reading the poems during editing required a tissue in hand because caregiving is filled with sadness and pain as well as poignant beauty. On the bright side, I discovered a private Facebook group for those suffering dementia and for their caregivers. We commiserate, share our experiences, give suggestions that worked for us, ask for advice, or just tell about our day with the disease. I have never seen a more supportive, loving online group, and am sorry I only found them at the end of this journey. I highly recommend the Memory People Facebook group.

Poems That Come to Mind is sad, there’s no getting around that. But I hope that caregivers reading it will be reminded there are also exquisite moments of love that burn all the brighter because of the darkness. I am treasuring those moments now.

Cherry blossoms gone
But their story lingers on
I turn the pages

I love you Mom.



About moonbridgebooks

Co-author of Cherry Blossoms in Twilight, a WWII Japan memoir of her mother's childhood; author of Poems That Come to Mind, for caregivers of dementia patients; Co-author/Editor of Battlefield Doc, a medic's memoir of combat duty during the Korean War; life writing enthusiast; loves history and culture (especially Japan), poetry, and cats
This entry was posted in aging, death, inspiration, poems and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

6 Responses to Loss of a loved one, finding poetry in caregiving

  1. Jan Morrill says:

    Sending love and prayers, Linda. Your mother’s beautiful soul shines in that photo and in your words.

  2. Linda, it is hard to let our parents go no matter what the circumstances. I love that you are able to express your feelings through poetry, and I know that it brings comfort to you. Your mom may be physically gone, but you carry her spirit within you.

  3. krpooler says:

    Oh, Linda, you really touched a chord in me with this lovely tribute to your beautiful Mom. I love her picture. May she rest in peace and may you find consolation in the stories and treasured memories you have captured so eloquently through your words. Sending blessings and hugs across the miles. xo

  4. Jean Lee says:

    I’m so sorry, Linda. Your mother’s memory goes on through your writing. Jean

  5. Thank you all for your kind thoughts. Our family loved having Mom’s Cherry Blossoms stories written down, but now that she has passed that book shines like gold. My oldest daughter hadn’t read much of Cherry Blossoms before, saying she knew most of those stories and she didn’t like reading memoirs, but in the last days while away at college she found comfort in reading about her grandmother’s life. Can’t tell you how thankful I am that I took the time to write Mom’s life down before her memories left her.

  6. My deepest sympathies. Your book is indeed a lovely tribute, and an inspiration to us all. I hope it brings you great comfort.

Let us know what you think

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s