Hurrah for the red, white and blue memories

July 4th is on a Sunday this year, meaning a long weekend for many and more reason than ever to gather around grilling burgers with family and friends and then throw down blankets for the fireworks show. Don’t forget the bug spray! My own extended family will be gathering at the folks’ big place to see how the kids have grown, swim in the lake, roast marshmallows over a bonfire, and set off some of our own fireworks – oops, I mean watch the neighborhood fireworks.

For many, the Fourth of July is one of those ritual holidays, where families do the same thing every year, instilling tradition into the next generation. My own kids love the bonfire and the fireworks glowing over the lake (and sometimes IN the lake). I love the gathering outdoors with all the family on my side, whom I rarely see. I love the bullfrogs bellowing in the darkness and the crackling sounds of the fire. I love how this particular holiday lends itself to relaxation, unlike the rush and busyness of Thanksgiving and Christmas. Thank goodness for July 4th, and thank goodness we live in the U.S.A. Despite faults, America is still a great place to live.
When writing memoir or life stories, don’t forget the minor holidays. Valentine’s Day, Mother’s or Father’s Day, Memorial Day, even St. Patrick’s Day might have some fun stories or traditions. What do I remember about childhood July 4ths? Dad driving us around in a lot of traffic trying to find a roadside spot to watch the fireworks at the stadium. Once we actually were in the stadium and, boy, those fireworks went so high and were so close that I thought the sparks would surely land on my head. And the booming that blasted through my little body. We won’t talk about my husband’s memories – boys and fireworks are a very volatile mix!

Hope you all have a great weekend exploding with fun and memories.
Be safe!

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A Father’s Memories

My dad got an early Father’s Day present last weekend. My daughter and I had to return her rental car far into Chicago and Daddy kindly agreed to give us a ride back. Since we would be near where Daddy grew up, I suggested we take a side trip to see his old haunts. My stepmom and her sister came along so we had a merry carload on the way back.

With Daddy pointing the way and my stepmom driving, we came upon his rebuilt elementary school no longer surrounded by tall grassy fields. Three houses stood where my grandmother’s tall old brown house had been, the giant horse chestnut trees only shady memories. It was now an unrecognizable place that meant nothing to me, but on the next street over we were delighted to find the little brick house my father was born in. Somehow he had neglected to ever show that to us! Farther on we discovered Daddy’s high school and the beautiful brick facade of his college’s Old Main. He pointed to the window of his English class room.

It was fun to see Daddy excited, telling stories of walking over the frozen river in winter to get to school, sweeping his arm across now imaginary hay fields that also held their cows and pigs and vegetable plots. He pointed out where old garages had burned down due to the combustible stills inside that gangsters ran during the Prohibition. Finally, he led us to a corner of a cemetery and showed us his parents’ grave marker–a burnt copper rectangle barely holding its own against encroaching grass. It was the first time I had ever seen it.

I took lots of pictures. We made Daddy get in some of them. I was enthralled, not just by the history, but by the transformation in my father. I believe Daddy felt half a century younger. All those years we visited Grandma almost every weekend yet never knew the secrets of the area. Daddy may have gotten a present that day, but so did the rest of us.

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Remembrance on Memorial Day

Memorial Day has morphed into a weekend of fun marking the beginning of summer, with little thought to the real meaning of the holiday which is to honor the memories of those who have passed on before us, particularly those who died in service of their country. Three years after the Civil War ended, Decoration Day was celebrated at Arlington National Cemetery on May 30, 1868, with flowers placed at the graves of those who died in that war. After WWI the last Monday in May was designated as Memorial Day to honor the dead of all American wars, and later families adopted the day to decorate the graves of anyone who was dearly departed. Amidst the barbeques and picnics, pause and toast the family members loved and lost, raise the flag to those who perished in wars, lay a flower on a grave.

The Battlefield

They dropped like flakes, they dropped like stars,
Like petals from a rose
When suddenly across the June
A wind with fingers goes.

They perished in the seamless grass,
No eye could find the place;
But God on his repealless list
Can summon every face.

     -Emily Dickinson

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