Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus — you’ve heard of the book. Last Sunday it was a sermon. I was visiting my family again around the July Fourth holiday and as usual attended the Crosswinds Church in Plainfield. Pastor John (the nuclear engineer) gave such a great talk: It’s a Guy Thing, Part II. We were all laughing and nodding. He reiterated some of the points that John Gray made in his book about the differences between the ways men and women think and behave, but drove home the idea that those differences can actually allow for harmony in our relationships. We may think of that harmony as being complementary to each other, strong points and weak points of each working together and balancing out, but Pastor John likened the harmony to a song: the different “notes” of our relationships stand out yet come together to make our life song more beautiful. We need to respect each others differences, listen to each others “notes” and adapt to each other to create that great song.
I sometimes play guitar and sing harmony with a male friend at our church’s quiet Stillpoint service. During our early days of practicing, I realized how important it is to listen to the other’s voice so as to work with it, making sure no one drowns the other out and that our notes concur in some parts and diverge in other parts — each voice noticeably different and yet together beautiful (well, we try). Sometimes we take turns leading and following. Pastor John’s wife does sing with the church band, but I’m not sure he realizes exactly how right on he was in his sermon. We all came away with a greater understanding of what makes a relationship great. In the end, though, he reminded us that even if we succeed in making beautiful songs together, God is the only one who can truly complete us for the ultimate in harmony.