When death takes your holiday

You’ve heard the old line, “Death doesn’t take a holiday.” While it is true, Death can certainly take your holiday. When the dark scythe casts a long shadow over a loved one’s soul around a time of celebration, whether Christmas, Thanksgiving, or even a birthday or anniversary, that special time is forever imbued with a twist of sadness.

We lost my husband’s uncle this week, not altogether unexpected, but sooner than thought. Some in our family will not be ready for Christmas, and old St. Nicholas will be unable to make things jolly. It will be a bleak midwinter day. And yet death is a time of togetherness, the bonding over someone loved, the tidings of comfort if not joy. Our uncle will be there with us, a part of our hearts and our memories, and so he lives on. We may be sad that his physical presence is gone from us, but we can still speak to his memory, hold his hand in his remaining possessions, and see him in photographs. His spirit can remain alive within us. And so, any time, and especially on each anniversary of the day he left for heaven, we can bring forth memories of him – the peanut brittle he loved to make, that fruit cake he ordered each Christmas, the rows of pecan trees he planted, the bright yellow Cub Cadet he splurged on (oh, my goodness, it wasn’t a John Deere!), an old photo of a little boy and his dog – to celebrate his life and remind us of the good times we shared with him.

Christmas will come, and he will have a place at our tables. We can raise a glass in his honor, to toast his life and what he meant to us. I think he’ll see us, and know how much we love him. Merry Christmas, Uncle Harold, and may peace be with you – and us.
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Storytelling tips for the job interview

My neighbor, the Cookie Queen, who makes memories each year with her annual holiday open house brimming with a vast assortment of home made cookies, is also a consultant in the field of chemistry and chemistry careers. She brought the following blog post from Career Solvers to my attention: What Your Grandparents Can Teach You About Interviewing.

Barbara Safrani, an expert on resume development, job search strategies, and interviewing skills, recently attended a workshop on storytelling and learned tips on how to be a better story teller as well as a better listener. She merged those ideas with her business knowledge in her blog post. In these trying times when so many are out of work and desperately searching for new jobs, I felt Barbara’s post was a very pertinent and practical use of life stories.

Four points to consider when interviewing include the fact that everyone has their own, unique individual stories of success in their past jobs, that the details are more fascinating than the general facts, that communicating successes and challenges showcases passion, and that a personal story creates a way of bonding with the interviewer. Highlighting your past work experiences in a personal way may help you stand out among other candidates. Good luck and best wishes to those in the midst of a job search (you may want to follow Barbara’s blog).

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Holiday storytelling, the talking turkey

The holidays are a perfect time for storytelling. Family gathered, lounging about with full bellies. A member of the Yahoo group Lifewritersforum posted an idea for a family game involving family stories. Each person writes on a small scrap of paper a hint about a story they know about someone in the family (ex. the giant spider in England, or she broke her arm flying off the swings). Put the papers in a container and take turns drawing them out and reading them. Guess who the story is about, that person then tells their story – with help if needed. This works best with larger gatherings, especially intergenerational or blended families.

I’ve been writing down the childhood stories of an 88-year-old friend who was orphaned at age 13. She, along with her then 16-year-old brother, somehow took care of their house and three little brothers during the Depression. Following is a story she told me, perfect for Thanksgiving:

One day in November, the theater had a raffle for a turkey. I took the boys to a movie and afterwards the manager came out to the front of the stage and announced that I had won the turkey! He said to go around the back to pick it up. When I got to the back of the theater, there was a box with a screen on top, and inside was a live turkey. What was I going to do with a live turkey?!

The manager said he couldn’t help me carry the turkey home, but he would tie up its legs. He said I could hold the turkey upside down by the legs and it would flap its wings, but I could carry it home that way. Oh, it squawked and flapped! We had to go across a stream on my way home. There were two logs laid across that stream and I had to balance across them with that turkey. Somehow I made it and got home all right. We tied the turkey by its leg to a post and it stayed there a couple days, not very happy. We didn’t really know what to do with it. Then my older brother got out the ax to kill it for Thanksgiving dinner, but every time he raised that axe the turkey cried, “Look out, look out!” It was like it was talking! “Look out, look out!” It kept saying that every time he raised the axe. “Look out, look out!” We were so upset. My brother just couldn’t kill it. I was crying. My little brothers were crying, “Let’s don’t eat turkey!”

Our neighbor next door came over to see what all the noise was about. He took care of it. He told us to go away because he didn’t want us to see what he was going to do. His wife made most of the Thanksgiving dinner for us and brought it over. My littlest brother was very upset about that turkey so I had to explain to him how God made turkeys and chickens for us to eat. He didn’t care about that and refused to eat the turkey. I ate some, but it bothered me to think of the poor thing. It was a Thanksgiving I’ll never forget.


(not all turkeys
come like this)
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